Settle down. I've been on kind of a hiatus for a while. The last job I inquired about was at a coffee shop I like...
[I walk up to the counter with my swagger and approach a woman I know is the owner]
Me: I'll have a small iced coffee, please.
Owner: OK...$2.55
Me [hands over money]: Here ya go. Also, are you looking for any help?
Owner: I'm sorry?
Me: Help, like, someone to work here.
Owner: Right. Not really.
[Hands me coffee]
Owner: I mean, because we mostly hire college students, and I won't know until I know their schedules.
Me: Oh, no problem.
Owner: It'll be several weeks.
[five-second pause]
Me: Well...my name's Jim.
Owner: OK...
[she hesitates, then takes out a pen and napkin and writes "Jim"]
Me: And I'm pretty reliable.
[hesitates again, writes "reliable"]
[five second pause]
Me: Thanks.
[I take my coffee and sit at a table directly across from the cash register. I read the newspaper, and I smile at her whenever we make eye contact. After about an hour, I leave].
But that's not really the point. Last week I was in Mississippi, pounding the Ativan and learning how to lay tile in the bathroom of a Katrina relief recipient. I may go back for a longer spell. I would get up early in the morning, build someone's house, stop early in the afternoon, work on my pilot, and get some crawfish. Why not? As far as I'm concerned, the coffee shop woman had her chance.
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